The weekend was absent new entries due to the second dance competition of the 2008 season. This was a great competition for dear daughter… 11 year old daughters who dance competitively and with passion have no idea that while they are frantically preparing for their on-stage rush, mom is dealing with satan’s spawn. This is to say, I am so over the dance moms. If, forgive you, you happen to be predisposed to diva-mama behavior, I have some advice.
(a) Sometimes humans have to pee. Sometimes moms have to get up and help their daughters change costumes. When you can’t find a seat at the venue and our blankets, jackets, bags, trophies, etc. are sitting on our seats? It’s not appropriate to sit on them. The blankets, jackets, bags, trophies, OR seats they are lying on. And when I get back with my differently costumed daughter to sit down and inform you that your toned, tanned, and Juicy Couture encrusted ass is on my shit? It’s not appropriate to say, ‘no seat saving allowed’ and turn around. And when I say, “could my daughter at least have the jacket you are actually SITTING ON so she’s not cold”? It’s not appropriate to pull it out from beneath your ass so hard that the pins she has worked her butt off to earn fall off. It’s also not appropriate to ignore that fact.
(b) Your daughter’s dance company is fine. They dance well, have plenty of rhinestones, and can do eight synchronized pirouettes in a row. That is great, and when she dances, I clap for her. It is understandable that throughout three days of nonstop dancing people don’t clap for every dance, sometimes we’re distracted. But when my distraction after my daughter’s company performs is from you saying, ‘ours will definitely score better than that one’? Not classy.
If your goal is to raise kids who don’t clap for anyone else during performances or awards, who have deplorable backstage behavior, and who have no respect for other space and things in the dressing room? You’re definitely on the right track.
But I don’t know if I can make it through another competition without a catfight where I rip your rhinestoned Dance Mom pin off.
